It's Not Enough

It's now two days past Christmas. Another Christmas in a string of Christmases spent in being single. It's the same for several of my other friends, but especially for one who has just gone through a break up in her relationship. I didn't know what to say to her. It was the same for those that are waiting for God to bless them with the intimate relationships that they desire. I just didn't know what to say to them. Everything that I could think of seemed so shallow. It wasn't enough.

When I think about my situation, I want so deeply to buy into what I've been told in my favorite Scripture. In Hebrews 13:5, God says, "Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you." He's telling me He is always with me. He's telling me that I am not alone. He's telling me that I have a relationship and companionship with Him. I want so badly to believe this. But there is one thing that keeps me from believing this one hundred percent. I can't physically touch God. Unless this happens, I can't believe it one hundred percent. Reading and believing this Scripture is not enough.

I know God loves me and my friends. I know He hears each of the prayers that we lift up to Him regarding our relationship status. I know He grieves with us for the pain in our hearts and for what is lacking in our lives. I know He wants to bless us with the relationships that we desire. I know that He does not want us to go through life single. My faith helps me to believe all of this. It's just not enough.

I want an intimate relationship with a woman here and now. I want to sense the scent of a woman. I want to feel her soft hands in mine. I want to feel the warm embrace of the woman that loves me unconditionally for who I am. I want to hear the soft, alto voice of the woman who believes in a loving God as I do. I want to hear the uplifting, joyous laugh of the woman that will enjoy each humorous moment that we can share together. I want to feel her soft kiss on my lips. I want to look deeply into her eyes and share her joys and sorrows. Until this happens, it's just not enough.

Lost

I'm sad.

No, it's not what you think. I'm sad because of the increasing comments that I'm hearing from people trying to find their Christmas spirit or losing their joy in this merriest of seasons. What's even more saddening is the fact that these comments are coming from Christian friends of mine. They're good people, but are good Christians doing what the rest of the world is doing? Are they getting caught up in the falsehood of this season?

Undoubtedly, this is a hectic time of year for many people. There are so many stressful decisions to make. It can start with something as simple as what card do I get. Then you multiply that by the number of people you think you need to give or send cards to. Then you graduate to gift giving. You have to find the right gift for that person that you decided to bless with a gift. Again, you multiply that stress by the number of people you think you need to give gifts to. Also factor in getting just the right gift wrap for that gift, then having to wrap it. Then you have to deliver it, unless they're coming over to your home, perhaps for a Christmas party. So, then you have the stress of organizing and putting on that party. Of course there's the after party clean up too.

Now I don't want to appear to be cold-hearted or lacking compassion, but it's only taken me a few decades to come to this conclusion; all of that is NOT IMPORTANT! What? What about blessing others? Okay, what about it? Do you REALLY think about honoring the act of giving as the Magi did two thousand years ago? Do you really? Do you REALLY get TRUE joy out of giving those gifts, sending those cards, or throwing and attending those parties? Be honest.

Many times when people do acts of kindness and compassion, they get that warm, fuzzy feeling that we all enjoy when we do something good. Too often during this time of year though, we just don't get that feeling that we enjoy experiencing. We have relegated ourselves to doing something habitual. Think about it. We do it every year at the same time of year. It's become old and mundane. There is no fire and passion in what we do. It's become a task that we really don't look forward to deep down inside. We don't realize or want to admit that what we are doing is not important.

We haven't lost the Christmas spirit, we've lost the Christmas Spirit. We have lost the true meaning of this season. It may be a cliche to some, but Jesus IS the reason for the season. We have to believe it. More importantly, we have to live it. It can't be just a catch phrase. It has to be the utmost in priority for Christians.

Do we dare give up the cards, the gifts and the parties to regain the Christmas Spirit and joy of the season? What if Christmas stopped being a day in December and became a daily event for us throughout the year? This is an extreme for most, but when Jesus regains His proper place in our hearts during this season, and throughout the rest of the year, we will capture the joy that we long for. That joy is what we receive through the Spirit in our hearts. The fruit of the Spirit is "love, JOY, peace," etc. Then it will truly be a Merry Christmas.

Forgotten

Hi,

I know it's that really hectic time of year. It seems like there's so much to do and very little time to do it. You have people to shop for, parties to go to, cards to send out and still have those mundane things to do like go to work. Isn't it great?

I just wanted to spend some time with you. It's been a while. Yeah, I know you're busy, but could we get together sometime? We used to talk a lot. Well, you did most of the talking and I mostly listened. Every now and then I'd say something, but I wondered if you heard me. Don't worry, you're not the only one. Some of my other friends say that I've got a small voice.

If you think you've done something to keep us apart, I forgive you. You know it's easy for me to forgive and you like how I forget. You know I can't hold a grudge against you. I just can't do that with you or any of my other friends. People can't understand how I can do that. I just tell them it's because it's so easy for me to love.

Will we be able to spend some time together on my birthday? It's coming up soon and I'd love to at least hear from you. You know I always make time for you. I think a lot about you every day. In fact, you could say I'm with you every moment in spirit. Even though you can't see me, I'm always by your side.

Always remember I love you. You know I would die for you. In fact, I did.

Love,

Jesus

Swift Response

I, along with many others, have said prayers asking for something from God. Quite often, the answers to these prayers are "wait". But every once in a while, God responds quickly.

I was appointed to my new position at my place of employment by God a little over a month ago. It had been something that I had prayed about for more than a year. After many responses of "wait" from Him, I finally received my "Yes". My usual answer from God is "wait", but last week He surprised me.

My job entails meeting sales quotas weekly. Last week, it seemed like we just were not going to make it. When that realization became evident, I quietly reminded God (like He needs to be?), that He was in control and whatever successes I would have in the job He appointed me to would be because of Him. I quietly asked that He provide the source that would allow us to meet our quota for the week. In less than ten minutes, we received government approval to proceed with a job that we had not expected and were able to perform the job the next day. There were obstacles in closing the sale, but that's for another time.

I also learned, again, tonight that He is also quick in the disciplining of His children. I foolishly lied about giving to a charity when I was approached for a donation by a woman when I arrived at my bank. I went to get cash out of the ATM when I noticed, as I pulled out my ATM card, that I had a couple of gift cards to the Claim Jumper in my wallet. I decided to give them to the woman that approached me as I took my card out of the machine. So I walked over and gave my gift cards to her, got in my car and drove off.

On the way home I stopped at a sandwich shop and went in to grab dinner. I placed my order and opened my wallet to pay the cashier. I looked in my wallet and it was empty. I had left the cash in the ATM at my bank. I had donated to and blessed the next person that stepped up to that ATM with forty dollars! I got spanked! Thank you God! We're both laughing about it now!

God loves me and there is no doubt that "the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away"... QUICKLY!

Be An Inspiration or Be Inspired

The question was posed. "Are you an inspiration to others or who inspires you?" It's taken me a few weeks to reflect on the question and come up with my perspective.

Am I an inspiration to others? I don't consciously think about doing something to be an inspiration to others. That seems to have an attitude of arrogance. Do I only want to do things so I can inspire someone else? The answer is a resounding "NO!" To do things this way seems self-centered with the focus on me and not on the action and the result. It shouts of "Hey, look at me! See what I did? Aren't I inspiring to you?" I should be doing things because of a higher road taken or because of a higher calling. "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." When you take action because of these attributes, people will notice because of the attitude taken in doing things.

What inspires me are the selfless acts of compassion that are more prevalent than I think people realize. These are not magnanimous acts done to get attention, but private and intimate ones. I was having lunch at a food court recently at one of the local shopping malls. Sitting at a table across from me was a man with his back to me and a woman that appeared to be his wife in an electric wheelchair. The woman moved next to him and I noticed that her hands were deformed due to some debilitating muscular disorder. This caused her not to be able to feed herself, but the man selflessly and patiently did. I sat there watching them for several minutes, hoping not to get caught staring at them in this wonderfully private and intimate moment. I could only hope that if the same circumstances presented themselves to me that I could be as compassionate and inspiring.

Community and Friends

Jacob Morgan has defined community as "A collection or group of people who have something in common and interact". Notice there is no reference to a physical or geographic location. I believe in today's high tech world, that is no longer necessary. Today, our high tech community now is the internet, otherwise known as cyberspace.

I love Facebook and Twitter. They allow me to keep up with my community of friends. I have instant access to what's going on in my friends' lives through their posts, and they can see what's going on in mine as soon as I post information. My community stretches hundreds and thousands of miles into two different countries. I am sure there are others on these sites whose communities are global. We have interaction at all times of the day, but there is one component that I miss. It's called intimacy.

One of the pastors at my church, Jeff Maguire, gave a great message last night. He has a way of personalizing his messages, so that the key points stick with you long after the message is given. He shared about the characteristics of his local community. He lives in an area where the garages to the homes are on alleys. There are people of all ages and ethnicities in his community. He and his family recently returned from a trip and his Pakistani neighbors were gracious enough to invite them over for dinner. They also have a common policy where if their garage doors are open, neighbors freely walk in and visit. This happened recently when a neighbor dropped in and asked if Jeff's wife, Amanda was baking cookies. She wasn't, but she brought out what she needed and began to make cookies. There is trust and a level of intimacy in this community.

Trust is a major component in any relationship, whether it be in community like Jeff's, or on a more intimate level with friends. Jeff's community is an example of how a trusting, diverse community can interact safely. I think trust is an even greater characteristic in friendships. Now understand there is a difference between acquaintances and friendships. There is no intimacy in an acquaintance, but there are varying levels in a friendship. In a friendship, you expose yourself more, you become transparent. There is a level of intimacy that leads you to a deeper relationship where you can "call out" your friends and they can do likewise to you.

I've noticed that there is very little intimacy in social networks. I don't know that I would be posting things there that people I barely knew would be able to read. My aim is to make all my social network friends, true friends. I've been able to reconnect with people that I had lost touch with since my high school days over thirty-five years ago. Part of the process is to visit with them and reestablish the intimacy that I feel is necessary in a friendship. It's amazing to know that even after all that time, we picked up like we had just seen each other the week before. When real friendships are established, they endure time and distance.